Samuel L. Jackson wants your kids to Go The (Bleep) to Sleep.

IF I wasn’t riddled with latent Catholic fear of spending the rest of eternity in Hell…. and IF I wasn’t worried about the damage it would do to Boo’s delicate 2 year-old psyche… and IF I wasn’t absolutely certain he would tell some random stranger, “Mommy wants me to go the fuck to sleep!” while we were shopping for $8 Merona t-shirts and kitschy designer lamps at Target, I would buy this book.

I mean COME ON. It’s the anthem for sleep deprived parents the world over. And you can only read Goodnight, Sweet Butterflies so many times before you start to get a little stabby, knowhuddahmean?

You can download the entire audio book here FREE for a limited time. You know, if you’re not afraid that Child Protective Services will show up on your doorstep the next morning. Which I am. So it’s more Are You My Mommy? for us.

About Chelsie

Mommy. Beauty product whore. Plastic lawn flamingo enthusiast. Nosy neighbor. One day novelist.
This entry was posted in Boo, Family, I should probably just apologize ahead of time, Internetland, No one else will think this is funny, Not nearly as offensive as it sounds and tagged , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

10 Responses to Samuel L. Jackson wants your kids to Go The (Bleep) to Sleep.

  1. melsar93 says:

    I think this just became my new baby shower gift.

  2. Jennifer Charter says:

    I saw this book on some news website a couple of months ago. I WANT it! I think it’s clever, and I saw the author said something like ‘If parents deny they want their kids to go to bed, they are LYING,’ which is so true! I have a sister in law that puts herself off as the ‘perfect parent.’ She’s nuts, and I want to buy her this book to watch her face look funny when she opens it.

  3. Go the fuckety fuck fuck fuckacta to sleep you little fuckers!

  4. Grace says:

    They chose the perfect narrator. Agreed that this is my new baby shower gift, but only to those with a sense of humor 😛

  5. Deborah the Closet Monster says:

    I’d meant to check out this for-parents book when a friend first linked it to me, but I wasn’t too invested. I mean, I already get to experience it almost nightly–why the heck would I want to read about it?!

    A friend linked me SLJ’s reading of it last night. I sat in the bedroom laughing till I cried for about three minutes, at which point I wandered into the living room and told Ba.D., “We have got to listen to this together.”

    We listened to it four times* last night. So. Much. Win! 😀

    * AFTER Li’l D went to bed, that is!

  6. Mrs. H. says:

    My husband and I were at Barnes & Noble two weekends ago and saw this book on the shelves. No children of our own just yet, but I read the book cover-to-cover in the middle of the store, just laughing my ever-loving ass off. I think I found it hysterical out of both genuine enjoyment of the concept…and also out of fear of our future. When I think about having children, I tend to forget these moments. The sleepless nights because the child just refuses to lay down. The projectile pooping (or, as you hilariously recounted, the poop-slinging/ -painting). This book is the best reminder for hopeful parents about just exactly what it is they’re hoping for! And the video? Classic. I’m going to show it to my husband when he gets home from work this evening. He’ll actively watch me swallow that little birth control pill from now on. 😉 Thanks so much for sharing this! It offered quite the laugh!

  7. Fred Miller says:

    One of our local DJs played excerpts from this last Friday on the air. Nice book.

  8. I read about this book on a News site a few weeks ago. Didn’t know the audio was narrated by Samuel L. Jackson!!!!! I am a mom of almost-2-year-old twins……they’re usually pretty good about going to sleep…..but on some nights, I just think to myself, go the f*** to sleep! And this is with only knowing the title and basic premise of this book. 🙂

  9. LOL I think it’s a book for parents, right? I think it’s hilarious!

  10. Hilarious book. Well, I remember very distinctly how my baby would open his eye right when I was about to put him in his crib – after singing for a good half an hour… It was very difficult to resume singing in a sweet voice…

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