Category Archives: Not nearly as offensive as it sounds

The Naked Man

I don’t know how mornings go in your house, but around here we have a little routine. When the childling wakes up at an ungodly hour that I dare not speak aloud, he bellows one of three things that are … Continue reading

Rate this:

Posted in Boo, No one else will think this is funny, Not nearly as offensive as it sounds, Weirdness | Tagged , , , | 2 Comments

Beauty Double Dare: Going Bare Down There

Not so long ago, I worked for Charm Fashion Agency and my editor trusted me enough to let me write what I wanted. This is what she got. There’s nothing sexy about at-home hair removal. Commercials romanticize it, depicting a … Continue reading

Rate this:

Posted in Not nearly as offensive as it sounds | Tagged , , , , , , , , | 2 Comments

This is the post I should remember when I get pulled aside for additional screening in an airport security line.

One day a long time ago–a magical, pre-Boo time full of lots of extra sleep and floors that stayed clean for more than five minutes–I was browsing through Barnes and Noble when I came across a book called Milk, Eggs, … Continue reading

Rate this:

Posted in Internetland, No one else will think this is funny, Not nearly as offensive as it sounds | Tagged , , , , , | 5 Comments

Samuel L. Jackson wants your kids to Go The (Bleep) to Sleep.

IF I wasn’t riddled with latent Catholic fear of spending the rest of eternity in Hell…. and IF I wasn’t worried about the damage it would do to Boo’s delicate 2 year-old psyche… and IF I wasn’t absolutely certain he … Continue reading

Rate this:

Posted in Boo, Family, I should probably just apologize ahead of time, Internetland, No one else will think this is funny, Not nearly as offensive as it sounds | Tagged , , , , , , , | 10 Comments

All Hail the Penis of Madagascar

Y’all, we’ve got a problem. And it sounds a whole lot like the word penis. My two-year old has an incredibly expansive vocabulary. He’s both articulate and expressive. Long gone are the days when Red and I sat around the … Continue reading

Rate this:

Posted in Boo, Family, No one else will think this is funny, Not nearly as offensive as it sounds | Tagged , , , , , | 8 Comments