Tag Archives: funny

Five Things You Thought You Knew About Moms Who Blog (but are completely false)

I’m a mom. I’m also a blogger. But I’m not really a mommy blogger. A quick peek at my archives would lead a lot of people to think that I’m full of shit, just like the time your elementary math … Continue reading

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Posted in Boo, Family, I should probably just apologize ahead of time, Internetland, Would it kill you to comment? | Tagged , , , , , , , , | 19 Comments

Someone hold muh earrings. This could get ugly.

Today was a good day. Even the part where I almost had to cut a woman at the children’s playground in the mall. But more on that later. My furry best friend is back. He’s been living with my parents … Continue reading

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Posted in Boo, Cat Lady Confessions, Family, Internetland, Nerdness, No one else will think this is funny | Tagged , , , , , , | 9 Comments

This is the post I should remember when I get pulled aside for additional screening in an airport security line.

One day a long time ago–a magical, pre-Boo time full of lots of extra sleep and floors that stayed clean for more than five minutes–I was browsing through Barnes and Noble when I came across a book called Milk, Eggs, … Continue reading

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Posted in Internetland, No one else will think this is funny, Not nearly as offensive as it sounds | Tagged , , , , , | 5 Comments

Samuel L. Jackson wants your kids to Go The (Bleep) to Sleep.

IF I wasn’t riddled with latent Catholic fear of spending the rest of eternity in Hell…. and IF I wasn’t worried about the damage it would do to Boo’s delicate 2 year-old psyche… and IF I wasn’t absolutely certain he … Continue reading

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Posted in Boo, Family, I should probably just apologize ahead of time, Internetland, No one else will think this is funny, Not nearly as offensive as it sounds | Tagged , , , , , , , | 10 Comments

Everybody should believe in something. I believe I’ll have another drink.

Someone once told me that if you can name three positive things that happened during the day, everything isn’t as bad as it sounds in your head. So far, these are my positives for today: 1) At the moment,  I’m … Continue reading

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Posted in Anger!, Boo, Family, No one else will think this is funny | Tagged , , , , , | 8 Comments

I bet Jesus would have used HIS turn signal.

Y’all, I’m pretty sure I saw Jesus today at Walmart. So there Boo and I were, circling the parking lot for a spot close enough to the door so that the heat wouldn’t melt out our eyeballs Raiders of the … Continue reading

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Posted in Boo, I should probably just apologize ahead of time, No one else will think this is funny, Only Vaguely Offensive, Weirdness | Tagged , , , , , , | 5 Comments

All Hail the Penis of Madagascar

Y’all, we’ve got a problem. And it sounds a whole lot like the word penis. My two-year old has an incredibly expansive vocabulary. He’s both articulate and expressive. Long gone are the days when Red and I sat around the … Continue reading

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Posted in Boo, Family, No one else will think this is funny, Not nearly as offensive as it sounds | Tagged , , , , , | 8 Comments

As God is my witness, I shall never again speak of what transpired tonight.

I have a good kid. I do. But sometimes… Sometimes I think he’s sneaking out of the house to cavort with feral pigs and vodoo priestesses in the moonlight while Red and I sleep. There’s no other way to explain … Continue reading

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Posted in Boo, Family, I should probably just apologize ahead of time, No one else will think this is funny, Red | Tagged , , , , | 10 Comments

Clearly, I’ve got my priorities in order.

Today has been an eventful one, weather wise. Early this morning, the Storm Prediction Center in Norman, Oklahoma, issued a Potentially Dangerous Situation tornado watch for our entire area, with a big red bullseye painted right over the top of … Continue reading

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Posted in Boo, Family, I should probably just apologize ahead of time, Internetland, No one else will think this is funny, Red | Tagged , , , , , , , | 14 Comments

Congratulations! If you’re reading this, you’re a filthy heathen.

Guess what? WE’RE ALL GONNA DIE. Soon(ish). Maybe. Probably. At some point. Because you know, the rapture is supposed to happen at 6:00 PM today. But… It’s after 6:00 in most of the world, and we’re all still here. As … Continue reading

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Posted in Family, I should probably just apologize ahead of time, Nerdness, No one else will think this is funny, Red | Tagged , , , , , , , | 10 Comments